Does being a Perfectionist Cause you Stress?

 

work stress, keynote speaker, how to deal with stress, anxiety, stress symptoms, signs and symptoms of stress, stress free, Show Stress Who's Boss!, carole spiers, stress management, stress & anxiety, symptoms of stress, stress management techniques, stress-free, stress symptoms, de stress, wellbeing, mental health

4 Easy Ways to Deal with Stress

“That’s perfect Anita– well done.  Have a gold star!”  Remember those nostalgic days when you were in school and you were told to chase those straight A’s?  How quickly a perfectionist learns to live by the words ‘I’m so pleased, this term I was top of my class’ and to enjoy the thrill of impressing others – and themselves – at the same time.  A perfectionist would cry if they only managed a B+ or ended up only in second place.  Some children hated school, but the chances are that the perfectionist child loved it as his, or her, success was quantifiable by the results of exams, assignments and  teacher feedback —particularly when they made the grade.  The maxim of ‘work hard and succeed’ worked like a dream for them.

However, those gold stars can sometimes cause a lifetime of frustration and personal dissatisfaction.  In the adult world, success is measured differently and, not being structured in the same way as in school, there may well be times when you will miss the ‘good old school days’ where an A+ was all that to which you aspired.

Continue reading

Listen

Stress Relief: Wear a smile every day…

According to the lyrics of a popular song, when you’re smiling, the whole world smiles with you, and as I listen to the words being sung on a YouTube video clip, it really brings a smile to my face. However, it also goes on to say “cry and you cry alone!” And that, I’m afraid, is also a truism.

A smile can be a great energy booster both for the giver and the receiver, so why don’t we all smile more often? You may say that you don’t always feel like smiling or that you’re not in the mood, and that may well be the case but just think of the effect of your mood has on those with whom you meet, your spouse, your colleague or your child. Continue reading

Listen

How to Deal With Stress: To Err is Human, to Forgive Divine…

We do not always behave or conduct ourselves as we should and
there are certain times when we wish we had not spoken, or acted, as we
did.   Sometimes, we have to accept that our relationship with someone has been broken. However, later there often comes a time when we might wish to try to make amends.  But what happens when the other person says it is too late or that they are no longer interested? Continue reading

Listen

Be stress free and start your own business or not?

Last week’s blog on retirement brought in many comments with people writing to tell me that they were thinking of starting their own small business.

In 1987, I established my stress management and counselling consultancy – and for me it was the right decision.   However, being one’s own boss requires a specific mindset plus a commitment that is different from working for someone else within a corporate environment.

What it takes to start

Before embarking on a self-employed career, you need to give consideration as to whether you are really suited to what will initially be a 24 hour job.  A majority of people would rather work alongside others rather than being an entrepreneur, working all hours and having to make all the decisions.  Going ‘solo’ is not right for everyone and it is important that you find out at the early stage before you put time, effort and finance into your new career. Continue reading

Listen

Learn How to Manage Your Anger

How many times do you feel angry but don’t know why?  How often do
you become aggressive and say things you don’t really mean, and then feel upset and guilty afterwards?  Similar events happen to most of us, at some time, and we fail to understand the reasons.

Very often, the answer has to do with excessive pressure that has caused you stress, which has turned to anger as you realise that you appear to have lost control of the situation. Then you take that anger and frustration out on others around you.  Sometimes that may be your family, or if at
work, your colleagues

Low self-esteem, in addition to stress, can also be at the heart of an angry outburst.  You may not identify this factor and it is only when you start to suffer the consequences of that low self-worth that you may start take a close look at the root cause within yourself. Continue reading

Listen

Be Stress Free and Enjoy the Community Spirit

Here in London, we have just experienced our first fall of snow this winter.  It arrived with a vengeance, severely affecting airports and roads.  The day
after, I went outside into the front garden to clear the path from snow and
within half an hour, I had spoken to many of my neighbours all clearing the
snow, like me, many of whom I rarely spoke to from one month to the next.  There we were, all sharing in a joint activity, offering cups of tea and coffee to each other.  Overnight, we had become a community again because we had a common interest.  None of us could get our cars out the driveway, and we were fighting against the weather to try to clear the driveways before the ice arrived overnight. Continue reading

Listen

Are You Stressed? Redundancy Can Strike Anyone

My client, Jeremy Saunders is married and works – or rather did work – as a Design Director, in London, for a large firm of manufacturers of sports goods.   He has worked for the company for over 10 years but, last week, was told that he is redundant and was
no longer required.

He had been half expecting to hear some bad news because a new CEO had been recently been recruited who had threatened to cut staff numbers.  He had talked about his fears with his wife but they decided to enjoy their Xmas and then face the situation in the New Year.  It wasn’t definite and there was a good chance of him keeping his job. Continue reading

Listen

Stressed? 20 Most Frequently Asked Questions About Stress in 2011

Find out how to deal with stress

4 Proven Steps to Beat Your Stress!

By Carole Spiers

As a weekly columnist for Gulf News, I have addressed many issues relating to workplace stress.  Many readers have written to me to ask me various questions regarding the best way to manage stress, so I thought it would be a good idea to share some of these with you.

Q:  What is stress?

A:  Stress is the adverse reaction that people have to excess pressure or other types of demands placed on them.  It arises when they perceive that they are unable to cope with those demands

Q:  Is stress good for me?

A:  No.  It is often mistakenly thought that stress is good for people, when in fact, long-term stress is invariably harmful.  A certain amount of pressure can indeed motivate and can therefore be useful, but stress is never so. Continue reading

Listen

Stressed – Because Your Desk is Untidy?

The Essential Guide for Managing Stress

I walked into a client’s office, last week, and she immediately apologised for the mess of her desk.  Papers strewn everywhere, with overflowing box files lying around the floor. Her noticeboard was covered with scraps of paper on top of one another, and post-it
notes stuck onto her monitor screen.

I said there was to need to apologise but I did wonder to myself how she could find anything when her desk was in such disorder, and how efficient was she at running her department. Afterwards, when we sat down for our meeting, it transpired that her life was, in fact, in turmoil, and the state of her desk was a reflection of her personal life.

Of course,  I am not saying that an untidy desk is always indicative of an untidy mind  as I have other clients who also work in what I regard as a ‘mess’ but they know where is
every piece of paper at any one time. Different people work differently. Continue reading

Listen

Relieve Stress in Your Retirement

Buy Carole Spiers new book ‘Show Stress Who’s Boss”.
Preferential Rate, Prior to Launch £10.00 [List price £15.00]  + P & P
Secure this offer & register your interest  to Anita: info@carolespiersgroup.co.uk

——————————————————————————————————————-
I appreciate that for many readers the thought of retirement may seem a very long way into the future.  However, it comes to us alleventually and for that new chapter in one’s life to be successful, it requires careful planning for the transition from work to leisure.

Contrary to what you may imagine, retirement can be one of the busiest and most exciting times of your life – a period to look forward to.  It means having time to breathe and doing what you want every day; it’s about starting something new; giving back to the community using the skills and knowledge you have gained over the years and
generally adjusting the pace of your life to a less structured day with fewer
commitments and deadlines.

Years ago, the traditional idea of retirement invoked images of elderly people with
walking sticks being helped across the road!  But today, retirement is nothing like that! Retirement can mean learning a new skill, writing a book, starting a new business, doing voluntary work, travelling, or mentoring young people.  An exciting new world that is full of endless possibilities. Continue reading

Listen